Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
