I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
