Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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