All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
