Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
