there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
