did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
