it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
PANTIES FOUND
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
