called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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