the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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