So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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