he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
babies were throwing up all over the place
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
