Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
