I can't watch pbs sober anymore
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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