were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
