anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize
