Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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