yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Randomize
