I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
