yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
