I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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