i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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