I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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