So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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