you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
