idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize