i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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