his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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