i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
