we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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