Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
