You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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