I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
another moral hangover. fuck.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize