My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
did i just pee glitter
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
