I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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