you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
