Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
