Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
