Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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