Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
