Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize