It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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