dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
