I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you