put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
