i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
