Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  YES

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  (586): If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct? (313): YES http://tfl.nu/udyu
  Replies (14) Good night (2362) Bad night (646)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.

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  (540): please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there. http://tfl.nu/5ny0
  Replies (17) Good night (904) Bad night (3390)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????

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  (414): they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed???? http://tfl.nu/zsp8
  Replies (39) Good night (6494) Bad night (1734)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.

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  (918): It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever. http://tfl.nu/0i0j
  Replies (31) Good night (999) Bad night (6009)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  tequila makes me forget i have legs

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  (250): tequila makes me forget i have legs http://tfl.nu/9rzk
  Replies (25) Good night (6231) Bad night (1393)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking

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  (801): Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking http://tfl.nu/5hl3
  Replies (11) Good night (4046) Bad night (1012)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.

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  (303): Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life. http://tfl.nu/utnc
  Replies (7) Good night (1209) Bad night (4177)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy

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  (407): She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy http://tfl.nu/3ht2
  Replies (16) Good night (2289) Bad night (1185)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.

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  (856): So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying. http://tfl.nu/yw9q
  Replies (2) Good night (1137) Bad night (613)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  am i new drunk or am i still drunk

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  (561): am i new drunk or am i still drunk http://tfl.nu/zvnj
  Replies (3) Good night (830) Bad night (378)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.

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  (505): A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk. http://tfl.nu/nmzj
  Replies (1) Good night (828) Bad night (606)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.

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  (630): I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it. http://tfl.nu/76pf
  Replies (3) Good night (493) Bad night (621)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.

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  (402): You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton. http://tfl.nu/mhhg
  Replies (3) Good night (492) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me

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  (978): I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me http://tfl.nu/vd1r
  Replies (1) Good night (429) Bad night (159)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.

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  (419): she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home. http://tfl.nu/hho7
  Replies (2) Good night (210) Bad night (123)

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