You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
