He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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