dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
