I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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