Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Is it penis luge time yet?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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